Sex and the City

Watching the season 4 episodes of the HBO original series Sex and the City has got me thinking....

Episode 60 "Just Say Yes"

At first, I couldn't understand why Carrie had to make such a big fuss about living together with her boyfriend, Aidan. After all, they have done all there is to be done. But then in the later episode, I got it. It's about the loss of privacy

* cannot do things you used to do when you live alone - things that others might think to be weird if they see you doing it, ummm now I'm trying to make my list :P -,
* having to consider the other person's preferences on how you manage the house
* having to tolerate the other person's bad habit -for my husband to be it will certainly be my untidiness, among others :P -
* having to share space, accepting the other person's pet or plant, or his/her treasures that you might feel like throwing away when (s)he is not looking :D

They made the fight for space n privacy here looked pretty scary, but I guess it does not have to be that way... well my married friends, wanna say a word about this? ;P


Episode 63 "Change of a Dress"

Whenever I saw my aunt Bettie in a wedding, she would always ask me "When will you have yours?". God, it was so annoying because I didn't have anyone to get married with. So once when I met her in a funeral, I asked her back "When will you have yours?".
- a joke, not my own story, mind you :D-

In the earlier episodes, Miranda talked about the pressure she experienced from her family about her having no boyfriend and Carrie was afraid of being a 35 and had no special man in her life (episode 49"The Agony and the 'Ex'-tasy"). And they despised being in the married people's world and being told "don't worry, you will find the right one for you"
-tell me about it :P-

The first time I had a boyfriend was after I finished my bachelor study, before that I had always been questioned by my relatives when I would get one. I was a shy girl and not really a drop-dead-gorgeus type and lacked of self confidence as I wrote before, I thought I would never have one. The relationship only lasted for 3 months, it was not a serious one.

Then only after a vacuum of 3 years did I find the man I love... it's been almost 2 years now... The 3 years vacuum was also filled with the tormenting question :D Everytime people -especially my mom- asked me I felt so annoyed and irritated.

When my mom told me to find myself a boyfriend at my Master's degree graduation, my reaction was 'Hey, I've accomplished this much, but still it seemed not good enough if I don't have any boyfriend." Do u think I was overreacting? Maybe it was also because of my fear of never finding any.

And now that I have my kangmas, the tormenting question have changed "When will you guys get married?". I guess after I get married, people will ask "When will you have a baby?". Hehehe, but come to think of it, I myself cannot help asking the same questions to my friends, just an act of courtesy or because I'm really excited to see them getting married or having a baby ... I hope you won't feel offended if ever I ask you such question :P so I should have known that people didn't mean to prey when they asked me those questions, but still I feel uneasy about it. Another similar case is when you don't have jobs -maybe you're just graduated from your study- and people ask you "have you got a job?".

Though I found it a bit strange for such successful and independent ladies in such country as the USA, to feel the same pressure as what I experienced. I thought it was only in Asian countries that girls are expected to be married as soon as possible :P If you are living in Europe or America, would you mind giving your comment?

Starting from the episode 60 Carrie talked about her being freaked out with the idea of getting married (and the finale is in episode 63, I don't wanna be a killjoy, so I won't talk about this). I still can't understand about this. What's the big deal for her, afterall she and her boyfriend have lived together and it's seems so easy to just get a divorce there if things don't go well. Anyone can enlighten me on this?

Could it be the same question as Ria discussed? -> is (s)he the "right" one? Could it be the fear of separation in case things really don't go well? Could it be the fear that after getting married, their love will cease to be like in many other marriages?

Hmm... that's all I can think of now.... gotta go now... wanna see the rest of the episodes... Ciao! :D